....Update!

Hello my B-E-A-utiful readers! Sorry I have not written in a while, I have been extremely busy with school, work and CRU stuff. I have also been busy growing and changing! That's right! Some major things have shifted in me since my last post a little over a week ago. (Time really does fly when you are in a full blown relationship with Christ! I wouldn't have believed it if I wasn't experiencing it myself lol!). But anyhooser...time for an update on where I am at and what I have learned recently!

The first thing that has changed is that guys are less distracting! It has taken YEARS  for me to be able to be on my own without feeling some sort of insecurity and assuming my relationship status is a direct reflection of me. And if you didn't know already from reading some of my blogs, I was struggling with major loneliness and I was extremely distracted by a couple of people. After some prayer, faith, and shifting in my heart, I am happy to say that I am no longer distracted easily, if it all, and I am owning and LOVING my Independence. A new light has been shed on my situation, and even though singleness is easy for some, it is a way of life that I have not ever been used to. Until now... :). I am truly content with where I am at in life and it is crazy how quickly and relatively smoothly I got to this place of peace. I only hope more women out there can do the same for themselves....on that note, I am going to share with you how I got to this point, and some of my new ways of looking at things that really really help me!

First off, the whole boy thing. How am I FINALLY ok with not being pursued by a Godly man right now? Easy! Reason number one, I am no longer worried about finding a Godly man now or even soon because it is not my time frame that God is working on! His is way better, and I need to just chill out, and wait. Patiently. Reason number two, there are so many other things to do besides worry about boys and their shenanigans! There is school, friends, leading others to God, family, unexplored talents and hobbies, passions to explore, friends and strangers who need love and encouragement...so many things to put energy into, and all of those things will be fruitful in one way or another. Reason number three, I finally understand that me not being pursued has nothing to do with me personally. It isn't because I'm too fat, or not pretty enough, or not fun enough etc, etc, etc...it isn't because I have competition and they are better than me in some way. It is simply this...the men who are not pursuing me, or are pursuing others, are just not right for me. They are planned for someone else, and someone else is planned for me.

Speaking of passions.....now that I am just focusing on God and myself, I am really discovering my passions now more than ever. My passion happens to be mission work, and evangelism (although I am not so good at the second one yet.) I also have a passion for helping my fellow ladies. I have taken away some of the "clouds" in my life, and I can see clearly what the Lord wants me to do with my life. My heart grows bigger and bigger for service each day, and I just can't wait to see what happens in the future. I am already looking forward to graduation and getting a job teaching, and then spending my summers in impoverished areas and countries helping the children and families. Big dreams I know, but I WILL do it :). It is really exciting to me that I am no longer assuming I will graduate, get married, and raise a family right away. Don't get me wrong, I will cherish that opportunity and it is part of what I want to do in my future...but instead of waiting around, thinking about how I am running out of time to find my soul mate in my college years, I am focusing on my future with just me and God. Because that is a certain thing, and the work that I want to do will be one of the most rewarding things I can ever do. My desires have changed, and my passion for others is going wild. I will have a family one day, I have full faith in that, but instead of waiting around for God to give me what I want, I am going to step up and give to him!

I hope everyone is doing well in everything! Keep your chins up, and KNOW that God has a beautiful, amazing plan for all of us. We just have to set aside our own and listen, and he will take care of us better than we could ever take care of ourselves. God bless!